April 2023 Newsletter
Welcome to April's edition of Philosopher's Tone! I'm your host, Professor Rebus, and I'm delighted to have you aboard the Pitcherwits™ Express. What can you expect? A monthly dose of bonus puzzles, wisdom and snippets about the English language! I hope you enjoy this month's publication.
A quick reminder that the puzzle PDF downloads are now fillable, meaning you can fill them out on your computer instead of having to print them. Before you try to fill them in, save the file to your desktop first instead of opening the file in your internet browser, otherwise they won't work properly.
Onwards!
Coming soon is The Prof’s membership programme! By joining this programme, you’ll get access to a reserved area online where you’ll find exclusive crosswords with cryptic picture clues.
Each week, Professor Rebus will provide you with a pack of 7 puzzles. It’s then up to you to make that all-important decision… Will you race through them in one go, or will you savour them to have a Pitcherwits® crossword for every day of the week?
Stay tuned for more information...
Sometimes going with the flow is no better than the efforts of a dead fish.
You might as well make your words today sweet, because tomorrow you may have to eat them!
The worst mistake you can make is the one that you learn nothing from.
The cost of living is increasing - but it’s still quite popular!
So, you can’t turn back the clock? True, but you can wind it up again.
Karateka: (a) karate fighter (b) dormant volcano (c) Maori sage
Emacity: (a) thin quality (b) attraction to buying (c) weight loss
Lactarium: (a) gut-friendly bacterium (b) a dairy (c) milk duct
Rubricate: (a) add red letters (b) write instructions for (c) make scarlet
Cacoethes: (a) succulent plant (b) chocolate tree (c) urge to go crazy
From the initials and the clue, what’s the phrase?
B.E.A.B.T. Fully alert and ready to enjoy life.
R.C.A.D. It’s throwing it down.
H.B.A.T. Just managing to stay on, but only just!
F.O.Y.O.S. You are such a scaredy cat!
U.T.C.W.A.P. Really stuck with no way out.
What are the rhyming phrases suggested by these clues?
L.T. Moonfish?
R.B. Apprentice turf accountant
T.W. Awe at the sound of lightning
S.M. Yellowy Lavatera
C.V. He wrecks waxed wicky ones!
Chuckle Lines
"Said Hamlet to Ophelia, I’ll draw a sketch of thee; what kind of pencil shall I use? 2B or not 2B?" - Spike Milligan
On Careers:
"At the employment exchange, my father gave his occupation as an astronaut, but not prepared to travel." - Roy Chubby Brown
"My mother is a travel agent for guilt trips." - Ruby Wax
"Being an astronomer is a very noble profession, but it does leave you at rather a loose end during the day." - Patrick Moore
"I called a temp agency for work and they asked me if I had any phone skills. I said, ‘I called you didn’t I?’" - Zach Galifianakis
"The easiest job I ever had was a store detective in a piano shop." - Rainer Hersch
"Help wanted. Telepath. You know where to apply." - Steve Wright
Signing off until next time...
Professor Rebus
Solve clues with us on Instagram at @pitcherwits
Answers:
What’s the meaning?
1. a
2. b
3. b
4. a
5. c
What’s that phrase?
1.Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
2. Raining cats and dogs.
3. Hanging by a thread.
4.Frightened of your own shadow.
5. Up the creek without a paddle.
Rhyme time
1.Lunar tuna
2. Rookie bookie
3.Thunder wonder
4. Sallow mallow
5. Candle vandal